I lost myself for a while...

I lost myself for a while...

I lost what it felt like
to be at peace with myself
to be one with myself
to be in control of my own mind
to be calm
to be loving/loved
to be spiritual
to be me.....


I drifted so far away from what I had taken so long to come in contact with that I'm not sure how I did it or how I even allowed it...

I had grown to meditate daily, to be calm and reserved, to not get caught up in control dramas, to just be and just like a snap of your fingers I lost it all completely.

For almost two years now, I have drifted I think just about as far away from that as I possibly could without getting completely lost. I did this all because I thought if I drifted from me then I could be more helpful for another. I forgot that I needed to look out for myself because I didn't think that I would need to during this time.

I was wrong, theres no need in getting into the details of what happened because it no longer matters. It's in the past and for me to move forward I have had to forgive, almost forget, and let it go..

I. Let. It. Go...

I done what I needed to do to better myself and to be able to move on in my life. I haven't felt this alive and like myself in so long that when I felt it again I was in an awe. It came on so suddenly and I was able to finally breathe, not that I wasn't breathing the entire time but I could focus on my breath I could feel it on my nostrils as I inhaled I could feel it touching every part of my lungs inflating them with the oxygen my body needs to live. I could feel my core, my center and I could feel the prana I was taking in. I felt it when it left my body when it touched the last of my nose before it was gone. I took a breathe for the first time in two years.

It was euphoric, it was amazing, it was beautiful. So beautiful.

I am finally becoming me once again after completely loosing who I was and I needed to share this somewhere to hopefully encourage someone else to find themselves again and to breathe for the first time in only they know when..

Take that breath, go to nature, gather the energy from Mother Earth and The Universe, find yourself <3